Emptiness
Sorry this is going to be a little long...
We’ve been said that we need to live for something, otherwise you feel the “emptiness” and emptiness is like a black hole vertigo sometimes you feel, everybody feels except the deaths...hey! Good point! The deaths have not that feeling as far as we may know..he he. We may relate this to the search of danger situations as a way of escaping from such fearsome feeling; the emotion of danger does not leave room for other feelings, unless for a while. Escaping from such emptiness and lack of purpose became a purpose...and danger becomes simply a method to overcome emptiness. The only problem is that danger craving tends to grow and you may end death...ok, the final solution after all...he he
But there are many other methods to escape from emptiness apart from danger, drug, alcohol or killing yourself wild snowboarding... However, one of the most ever popular and conventional methods are: building a nice Ego. Ego is what you’ve been said you are. Since you are a baby, you are said to be, for example, Roberto, male, white, Christian, good boy, intelligent, good at sports, not so good in this or that... Actually, ego is a representation of yourself...but not get confused: the map is not the territory. We tend to live thinking that we are such representation (identification) and that representation seems to have its own life, its own voice. We identify ourselves with such hallucination and let it grow inside us (mentally, virtually) and it starts making decisions for us. Ego is always building itself and wants to grow more and more, that´s why all of us are always in the road of becoming something....student, engineer, rich, married, parent..Environmental activist, handsome, smart, slim, strong, sexy, good citizen etc.. etc... Ego is very demanding, it always wants more. So, tell me a method to overcome emptiness and lack of purpose? Ego. With Ego you can become a Wall Street broker or a doctor investigating a drug for a cancer cure o you can devote yourself to a big idea, liberty, justice for all or may be simply to become a father and let you kids do something you will identify yourself, i.e. make your ego grow. We call it parents proud. Many psycho therapies are aimed to empower damaged or out-of-order Egos. However, I will not recommend feeding Ego as I would have not recommend Frodo to use the ring. You cannot make use of the “only ring”. The ring has its own life, you are a stepping stone. It is evil by itself. Of course, it will give you in return of your devotion, a feeling of power and importance but it will let you down if you try to destroy it. In summary, we spend the whole life evolving around always trying to become something/somebody. That gives a feeling of purpose of life and relax our emptiness feelings.
Ok, let’s try a different approach. Let’s imagine for a while that there’s no purpose of living that actually asking for a purpose is a wrong question. If the sun is shining, will you ask “is the sun is shining?” If you ask...something is wrong. It is like when you feel you eyes or ears. If you feel them, something wrong. Ok, agreed, there’s something wrong but what about this emptiness feeling? I tell you what’s wrong. Your ego is a (false) friend but most of the time is like Krueger on Elm Street. If you decide that you don’t need to do nothing special to live, that you are free (even from Ego) from purposes, ambitions, identification, that you have no need to become nothing in particular, you don’t need to be handsome, more intelligent than your friend, what’s Ego for, then? Emptiness is the nightmare build by our Ego, the way to keep itself alive. But actually, there’s no emptiness, at least not of the kind shown by Krueger Ego.
But this is only academic...Good reading Jiddu Krishnamurti, who uses to live in California in the 60s. Alan Watts, too.
Sorry again.
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